Same Old Happiness Debate.

Way to much stuff is happening in life currently, college taking most of my time with tests and assignments on full swing ,labs, seminars, some stuff I am doing for the college’s fest website (which btw gets rejected every time by a snob of an in charge – miss (or Mrs ?) AV) , random fun activities with friends in the hostel and random unnecessary arguments with not so much friendly people etc. etc.

Ironically not much variety of emotions were part of all this other than the usual happiness and excitement on the outside. I always deliberately strive hard to maintain them on my face even if it’s fake and recently came to know of it’s allowance. Quite inspiring it is when people come to you to ask how you remain so cheerful all the time? Always leaves me speechless…Coz the truth is, when we were a child, we maintained a gleeful façade effortlessly because of our life back then permitted us to do so but now its exceptionally hard to maintain and that’s where the issue starts. 

You must be wondering why on every other personal post of mine I rope in this topic of keeping your spirits high all the time? For one last time I wish to clarify a few things and end this topic for once and for all:

From quite some time now, I have been observing people and their behaviour around me and realised that my jovial form is many a times quite discerning to them. Let’s put it in the right sense, it’s hard for people to believe how can a person be cheerful most of the times? I am not sure if I should use the word but I believe it makes them jealous. How can I say that? This I can’t disclose coz it would lead to bad mouthing people which I don’t appreciate. I am not trying to sound like an overtly intellectual person on the road to sainthood, no, it’s just that a few things really gets on your mind and the only tool I have to flush them out is by writing it down on my blog (as I have told you: it’s my personal venting machine).

Anyway the point is, people start perceiving me as someone who is exceptionally lucky at all times, everything only good is what befalls on me, they envy the company of people that constitute my dwelling space, they envy my lifestyle, my choices, my way of living in general. This is not a self-appraisal post but this is what I genuinely felt. The envy part is not my chunk of concern, it’s quite righteous in fact, what bugs me is when their envy results in them performing particularly immature and irrational deeds. They start to treat you differently, judge your actions all the time, leave snide remarks about your personality, be unnecessarily sarcastic of even your unpretentious feelings and in general behaving in a way to let you down socially or in person.

For all of you… here’s some reality bite-

for starters, I M HUMAN !!! this fact I believe people seem to be forgetting these days, maybe i don't come across as a normal being to them. Hence for a fact I want to state this in writing: "I too, have and am facing failures, disappointments, anger, sadness, longing, fear, remorse and even jealousy. I have as much of negatives in my life as every next person has in his life." Just coz I don’t believe in sharing the pessimistic me with others doesn’t make me someone living the best life in the world. So your envy, though I am guilty to admit smug up the egotistical me, is in fact quite inane and futile.

I hope this clears the air but now that i come to think of it, if seeing someone happy makes you envious and involuntarily lets you do disgraceful acts then maybe, you don’t deserve a blog post of mine, what you need is maybe a dose of “Art of Living” to help you realise that life is so much more fun to be around people who are happy in other’s happiness. I am not authorised to say all this when I myself at times find it arduous to follow but at least I make an effort and it’s high time you do the same.

PS: Probably this is the reason I take awfully long to be social with people and ages to include them in my list of friends (for life and not on the friend list on fb). Coz its difficult to find people who understand you and your believes and share a common ground somewhere or even if they don’t at least they know to respect other’s doctrines and principles.