It started out with denial, neglect swooped in next, followed
by indifference and finally it struck me with horror and disbelief. Yes, College has practically ended. Hostel
life is over, possibly forever. People are waiting for the 21st for
the apocalypse to strike; I seem to be going through mine already.
There are a million things I could write about currently and
they would still not suffice what College and hostel life meant for me and
probably everyone who has lived through it for the past 4 years or anytime in
their life. And nothing I can say or write about can ever come even close to
describing the feeling of it ending. And that’s not the point of this post
anyway.
People are inherently different. Their nature, their
thinking, their emotional capacity, their interests and everything else taken
together makes them who they are, stands them out from everyone else. But one
thing that is probably common among all these differences is their reaction to
endings. They make us sad. They make us nostalgic, they make us want to hold on
to people, to hug them and never let them go.
I’m innately awkward around people, more so in front of
people I love. So I choose indifference and neglect as a defense mechanism. I
act like it doesn’t bother me because that’s the easy way out of dealing with
endings. But that’s not it. Saying goodbyes to people you care about is like
accepting the fact that you’ll never meet again and stamping your approval of
it. I challenge that. I refuse to accept it and fail to reason why things can’t
be the same someway into the future. Sure, we won’t be in College anymore but
we could still be together, we could meet up often, maybe things might even be
better than what they are right now. So I like to leave conversations in
between, dues left unmet, goodbyes never said, just so whenever we meet,
howsoever late that might be, we may start right from where we left each other.
Like nothing really affected us. It was just a really long 'brb'. I know this is
being over optimistic, but I have had my share of pessimism in the past and it
hasn’t taken me anywhere.
PS: The title is simply because that's probably the last SRK movie I liked (and everyone else hated), 'Chak de..' released earlier right?
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